True & Truth: Managing Personal & Objective Truths (Part 1)

Summary

Do you struggle with the truth? Have you ever experienced a situation where you navigated a circumstance with near certainty that your version of the truth was, well, true only to find out that you didn’t have all the information and your personal truth was not reflective of the objective (real) truth? Me neither, but I know people who have had this experience…

One main truth that those closest to me know is that I love movies. I always have. I love the emotion, drama, theatre, comedy, tension, escapism, fantasy, happiness, and sadness that are expertly portrayed through the stories told. I also learn something from every single movie I watch. Some of the learnings are subtle, and some can be quite profound.

We all have stories that we play a part in. We might be an extra, a bit-part, a key role, or the lead in the story. It is important that we understand our role in the story, how we’re supposed to ‘act’ (i.e., the optimum behaviours that will serve us and others), and how much information we are likely to have access to when performing our role.

It all sounds a bit abstract, doesn’t it? The main point I’m trying to make for you is that your role in each of your stories will be nuanced and your knowledge of the entire ‘script’ (i.e., all information about the entire plot, and what each character feels, says, and does) will likely be determined by your role. Sometimes you will have most of the information. Sometimes you’ll have very little.

This is where the concept of true and truth comes in. Something can be true for you (i.e., your personal truth), but in the context of the entire storyline, it may bear little resemblance to the objective truth. This is a contextual nuance that I have worked on with many coaching clients to be able to release themselves from the burdens of what their truths are telling them.

In this blog, we’ll review the topic of personal and objective truth, what they are, how to discern between them, and how best to manage them to help serve you better.

True and Truth

Before we start on the topic of personal truth, we’ll review the dictionary.com versions for both true and truth, starting with true:

• In accordance with the actual state or conditions
• Conforming to reality or fact
• Real
• Exact; precise; accurate; correct
• Honest; honorable; upright

What descriptors stand out for you? I want to be clear here that there is nothing in this list that would or should diminish or invalidate the experience you are having with your own personal truth. That isn’t what we’re doing here. Your experience will be real and normal for you. Now onto truth:

• The true or actual state of a matter
• Conformity with fact or reality
• A verified or indisputable fact
• Actuality
• An obvious or accepted fact

To me, this list feels more holistic than the previous one and talks to the more holographic nature of truth. The key for you is to know whether you are dealing with personal or objective truth, and what you will do with that information once it becomes clear.

What Personal Truth Is

Your personal truth is your own subjective reality. Objectivity, based on the circumstances present will be a factor in your subjective reality, however the key components for your personal truth include your:

• Beliefs: Convictions or acceptances that certain things are true or real, often formed through education or experiences, and are based on influences in our lives (e.g., cultural, societal, familial, religious, etc.)
• Experiences: Personal, vicarious, or observed events that have left an impression on you. Note that sometimes our experiences may end up challenging our existing beliefs
• Perceptions: Interpretations we make based on sensory interactions. Perceptions are subjective, prone to biases, and can vary greatly even between individuals with similar beliefs who are exposed to the same experience

Your personal truth will incorporate what you feel and what you believe to be true based on your life journey, which will then influence your reaction(s) to the truth that you are facing in each moment or circumstance.

Here is where I normally include a section that says, ‘What Personal Truth Is Not’. For this blog, I won’t include a dedicated section for that, but will emphasize that your personal truth is literally that – personal to you. That means that it isn’t necessarily true for everyone else, nor is it the objective truth, which we’ll explore below.

What Objective Truth Is

The objective truth is the reality that exists independently of our beliefs, experiences, and perceptions. It is fact and / or evidence-based and remains consistent regardless of any form of external influencing factors. It might not always be popular, and sometimes it can be difficult to believe when you are so invested in your own personal truth, which is why it takes a step change in your own processing to consider the distinction between personal and objective truths. If I could boil it down to one main comparative, it would be that we are talking about (personal) perception vs (objective) reality.

Now, when I say, ‘perception vs reality’, that is in no way intended to downplay our own personal thoughts, feelings, and interpretations. Sometimes we use the phrase ‘perception vs reality’ as a flippant expression to describe fantasy vs the truth. What I am attempting to convey here is that objective truths are unaffected by emotions or personal feelings and remain independent from anything other than facts and evidence.

Interpretations and Limiting Beliefs

I think now is a good time to give you a throwback to my Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) core training as it relates to personal and objective truth. Two key components that are prevalent in your ability to evoke self-awareness to establish which truth you are working within are described below:

• Interpretations: A story, opinion, or judgment that you create about an event, situation, person, or experience and believe to be true
• Limiting beliefs: A generalization, stereotype, or idea that you learned and accepted about yourself, about the world, or about other people that limits you in some way

These are important to know as they help sprinkle in some reality for you as you continue to move forward. Simply asking yourself, ‘How true is that interpretation?’ or ‘What evidence do I have to support that belief?’, will provide you with more clarity in discovering whether you’re leaning towards your own personal truth or are working within objective truth. Expansive thinking is key when considering the truth.

How to Discern Between Personal and Objective Truth

How do you know whether you’re dealing within a personal or objective truth? I can tell you that being open to the fact that there is more than your own truth in the mix is a tremendous start! The following list provides some pointers on how to dig deeper and go further to get to the clarity that you seek:

• Seek evidence: Your personal truths will be evidenced and backed by personal experiences and gut feelings. For objective truths, look for empirical data and facts
• Challenge perceptions and assumptions: Actively question your perceptions and assumptions and consider alternative viewpoints. Be open to changing your mind should new evidence give you cause to do so (i.e. a growth mindset)
• Manage confirmation bias: The path of least resistance or general tendency in us as humans is to seek information that confirms our beliefs, which can lead us to ignore contradicting evidence. Being aware that everyone has their own biases and that is a normal human trait will allow you to be more open to exploring their impact on your actions
• Reflect: Take time to reflect on your interpretations and beliefs. Consider how they were formed, and how they influence your perceptions and experiences
• Seek diverse experiences: Use your network and other resources available to you to engage in dialogue and information sharing that can expand your mindset
• Practice mindfulness: In life, there are few times where mindfulness is unhelpful. Using techniques such as yoga, meditation, or breath work can help you become more aware of yourself

You will have your own personal approach to fact-finding, information gathering, and analysis. I’m going to be so bold to suggest that your process will likely contain a number, if not all, of the above suggestions. Consider how you do it today – is there anything I’ve missed from this list?

How to Manage Personal and Objective Truths Effectively

Now that we’re more understanding of the bigger picture in terms of truth as it relates to the stories that you experience, we can start to consider the best way of navigating and managing these. The following list provides key components of effective truth management:

• Balance truths: Acknowledge your personal truth then validate it with objective evidence. Gauge the results and use them to help determine your next best step
• Adaptability: Be prepared to modify your personal truth(s) if / when new evidence presents itself. This type of flexibility and open-mindedness allows for greater personal growth and clarity
• Clear communication: When sharing your truth, clearly distinguish between what you know for a fact, what you think you know, and what you know that you don’t know. Discern between your personal experiences and objective facts
• Educate yourself: Intentionally and proactively stay updated with information and knowledge from reliable sources. Understand that some truth is static and some dynamic and manage this accordingly
• Emotional intelligence: Be aware of and manage the influence of your emotions

These are staple items that should be considered for managing your truth going forward. Do any of these resonate with you more than others?

Conclusion

In this blog I intended to highlight the clear distinction between personal and objective truths, why it is important to acknowledge that more than one truth exists, and their impacts on your thoughts, feelings, and actions. I hope that the information contained herein landed as intended and at a digestible level of detail for you.

In the next blog I will further this conversation by delving into this topic at a deeper level, considering both the benefits and consequences of managing truth well.

Coach Gaz Challenge: Consider a recent example of a situation where you leaned more heavily towards a personal truth and didn’t leave requisite room for the impact and influence of the objective truth. How did that work out for you? Using the 5 steps in the management section above, articulate what areas you were more delinquent in than others, and consider how the outcomes could have been different had you read this blog first. Please do let me know how that goes.

I’m always open to a conversation on your thoughts, opinions, and experiences on this or any topic in the library. Get in touch by subscribing below, or by using the form on the Book Gary of the site.